New blog for a new year, fresh start.
I’ll no longer be updating here — follow me at
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<3
When will you be back in the city, doll? xx
The 12th, just for a short period of time. :) Thoroughly thrilled.
I dreamt in incredible color of my city last night - this morning - – my city, and even then a place grown from my imagination, an impossible collage of landscapes and architecture that exist only in the dormant recesses of my mind. There were people, interactions, kisses, conversation. Sun and then startling pewter rain and umbrellas to shield our hair. Flowers at a market, by the dozens, spilling from bouquets into pots into bushes and falling out into the cobblestone streets, trodden on by passing feet. It was a land for lovers lost in a trance, a Parisian New York of pure exhilaration that began and ended in your eyes and my hands and a joyful emotion I’ve yet to place anywhere but in somnolence.
Love a man who wears a watch.
No matter how my head may be swaying and my heart may be whispering, the goodbye kiss is always the hardest… Crush me in your embrace, parting is so bitter. Fly safe, prince.
And a new year. 2012, be good to me. 2011 has been tumultuous – life is unexpected, always, these days. May that never change.
i like it like that!
hey, windows down,
chillin’ with the radio on.
i like it like that!
damn, sun so hot,
make the girls take it all off.
I don’t know what to think anymore, sometimes. I’m unsure where my life is headed. I feel like the days are passing me by and I’m not noticing many of them, time is leaving me behind. I will not be forgotten. How many times must I be knocked down before I find my footing, find my way? Vague directions, vague plans, and everytime I finally think things are settling and I’m finding a rhythm, a new variable is introduced. And every time, without fail, that variable throws me off-kilter once more.
I need to see my city, I need to breathe again. I need to see you. I miss you, more than words can say, every day. New York, you call my name, you and everything you hold.
This town is killing my spirit. Sometimes I feel like I'm over-dramatizing when I talk about Colorado, but it’s true. The days go by and I forget the bigger life because forgetting is easier than remembering. I forget who I was, who I am, because the pain of absence is still so fresh. There is nothing else in this world that makes my heart leap so much as seeing that Manhattan skyline – in films, photographs, anywhere I can find it. I have never seared anything into my memory so clearly as I have the appearance of New York City, never mapped anything so firmly into my conscious as those streets. I close my eyes in dark moments and there’s a shining city behind my eyelids, tracing and retracing every step I ever took. It seems like another lifetime, a reverie, and I want it back so badly I could die for it. Every personality it holds, every memory, every sound.
It won’t be long now.
